Blogs | Marriage & Divorce

Marriage Series: Seeing beyond the Obvious

An important, perhaps the most important, ability to creating a successful marriage, even from one that is not currently going well, is the ability to see beyond the obvious. This is not easy to do. Let us give you an example, in fact the example that inspired our research and the resulting book, The Road […]

Marriage Series. Discussions to Have Before Marriage: Crushes

The blogs in this Series describe helpful discussions to have before marriage.[1] In a sense, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. These discussions set a framework within which couples considering marriage, or are already married, can predict typical points of disagreement and plan for them. Affairs during marriage often lead […]

Understanding a Sensible Divorce

Introduction and Confused Beliefs In our book, Planning a Sensible Divorce: How to Avoid the Toxic Dance of a Messy Divorce, Ken and Allan make the point that about twenty percent of current divorces are fairly amicable. About another twenty percent involve spouses with mental disorders or conduct problems, such as violence, or both […]

Marital Conflict and Understanding Perspetive

By Kenneth R. Waldron, PhD and Allan R. Koritzinsky, JD[1] Introduction Cassie and Mark marry. They are in love. They have dated long enough to believe that they know one another and are looking forward to a life together. They have discussed important topics, such as having children. They are aware that many marriages end […]

Marriage Booklet: Saving a Marriage

By Kenneth R. Waldron, PhD and Allan R. Koritzinsky, JD[1] Introduction If you are reading this, you might be a married person whose marriage is causing you to suffer, not only making you doubt whether you should remain married but also hoping that somehow your marriage can be turned around. You might have children and […]

The Incompatibility Gap: But Are We Really Incompatible

Every spouse is incompatible with every other spouse. However, this does not rule out that spouses, who see themselves as incompatible with one another, can have a successful marriage. There are two types of incompatibility, both of which can come up at any time in a marriage. A problem with no solution Daryl and Margie […]

Marriage Series: “No, You’re Wrong” Disagreeing About Who Is Right

…There is a tale worth remembering There was a Monk in Thailand known for his goodness, knowledge and wisdom. Because of this, people living in the area often turn to him to resolve disputes. Two farmers come to him with a dispute over the boundaries on their land and access to water from the stream […]

Marriage Series: What is Wrong with Lying (…if you can get away with it)

In order to answer this question, we need to first ask and answer other questions. Please read on! What is a lie? The answer to this question might seem obvious to most people. A lie is when a person tells someone, or many people, something that is not true. However, we must add that for […]

Marriage Series: How You Define a Marital Disagreement Matters

As we point out in another blog in the Marriage Series, Marital Partners Have Differences and Disagreements, disagreements in a marriage, or even before a marriage, are unavoidable. People have differences that lead to disagreements. They might be as unimportant as what movie to go to, but eventually can be very important, such as a […]

Marriage Series: “Can My Marriage Be Saved?”

Spouses asking that question usually deserve a “yes” answer. The question suggests that, while the marriage might have serious problems, the spouses are still hopeful and motivated. It is when spouses reach the point of not really caring anymore for one another or not caring whether the marriage ends. When this happens, they do not […]