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The Grey Divorce
A surprising statistic is that about a third of all recent divorces are occurring with spouses over 50 years of age. These divorces have taken on the name, “Grey Divorce,” for obvious reasons. This is twice the number that was true in 1990. As with younger divorces, women initiate the divorce twice as often as […]
Managing Emotions in a Divorce
Most divorces are dominated in the early stages by strong emotions. At the same time, the biggest obstacles to having a sensible divorce are strong emotions. It is, therefore, not surprising that as many as 80% of divorcing spouses make major mistakes handling their divorce because the process is dominated by their strong emotions. In […]
Marriage Series: Having a Successful Marriage Takes Skill: Criticisms
Remember those days when you were young and someone criticized you? Recently, we read about on-line criticisms driving young teens to suicide. Social shame is powerful. As we got older, our reactions to criticism become tempered, but for most, never really go away. Dennis was one of the early readers of our book, The Road […]
Marriage Series: Navigating the Invisible Line to Achieve Balance Btween Your Work, Social Life and a Successful Marriage
One of the most significant challenges in marriage is finding a harmonious balance between work, social life, individual activities and nurturing a flourishing relationship when married. This balancing act demands effort, time and focus. However, the “invisible line” that signifies this equilibrium of our focus and attention is ever-changing and feel elusive. The Pivotal Questions. […]
Marriage Series: It Is Surprisingly Easy to Improve a Marriage
It really is easy to improve a marriage, but there are obstacles. The obstacles are not what spouses think; it is what the spouse believe, summarized as follows: Spouses develop beliefs about why their marriage is not better than it is.Most of the time, those are negative beliefs about the other spouse. Spouses in a […]
Marriage Series: Changing Beliefs About Your Marriage
“Your Marriage Book is Very Interesting, but You Don’t Know my Spouse!” In our book, The Road to Marital Success is Unpaved: Seven Skills for Making Marriage Work, we introduce and describe nine important principles [Nine Essential Ingredients to a Successful Marriage] and seven essential skills [Seven Skills for resolving marital disagreements]. Our research indicates […]
Divorce Series: Managing Emotions in Divorce
Most divorces are dominated in the early stages by strong emotions. At the same time, the biggest obstacle to having a sensible divorce is strong emotions. It is, therefore, not surprising that as many as 80% of divorcing spouses make major mistakes handling their divorce because it is dominated by their strong emotions. Those mistakes […]
Divorce Series: Parental Alienation – Its Causes and Cures
Parental alienation and Game Theory[1]. When Ken was in private practice, one of his known areas of expertise was “parental alienation”. These were cases in which a child, at a minimum, expressed a desire, or more seriously, had successfully refused, to spend time with one of their parents.[2] In practical terms, this meant Ken serving […]
Marriage Series: A Real Example of Our Lessons Learned Regarding Marriage Principles and Skills
Our book, The Road to Marital Success is Unpaved: Seven Skills for Making Marriage Work, lays out nine necessary principles and seven essential skills based on research for reaching a successful marriage. A successful marriage includes as many disagreements as an unsuccessful marriage, but the disagreements get resolved successfully, quickly and with less emotional damage. […]
Marriage Series: A Good Marriage is a Matter of Life and Death
Is this an exaggeration? It is a well-known fact that married people generally live longer than divorced or single people. Less known is that spouses who describe their marriage as satisfying live longer than spouses who describe their marriage as unsatisfying. These differences can contribute to better health and can add over five years to […]